Thursday, January 26, 2012

Hollywood actors real names


 While rummaging in the Yahoo! cupboard for a pair of purple flip flops and a promotional beach ball to take to the beach, we stumbled across a treasure chest of names that no one really recognised.

After delving a little deeper we found that they are actually the real names of the hottest Hollywood stars. Here’s what we found:


Jennifer Aniston - Jennifer Anastassakis
Not the wildest change of name, as it sounds as though it stemmed from a fairly lazy teacher who couldn’t be bothered to ask how to pronounce it. Either that of Jennifer couldn't pronounce it herself. They are the only possible explanations.

Nicolas Cage - Nicolas Kim Coppola
With Nic Cage’s recent spell in a police cell, this change of name seems fairly ironic. Maybe it was all part of his master plan to distance himself from the Coppola family.

Michael Caine - Maurice Joseph Micklewhite
Probably one of the wisest name changes in the history of letters. Maurice Micklewhite sounds more like a killer in ‘The Hills Have Eyes’ rather than a talented actor. The name would have helped him get an endorsement deal with M&Ms though. Swings and roundabouts we guess.

Michael Keaton - Michael John Douglas
Quite clearly a ploy to steer clear of a case of mistaken identity. He might have accidentally won an Oscar though.

Marilyn Monroe - Norma Jean Mortenson - Norma Jean Baker
One of the most iconic names in cinematic history is one just plucked from the air before her first audition. A bit disappointing, much like the Enigma… or ‘The Tourist’.

Natalie Portman - Natalie Hershlag
Natalie probably spotted the iconic Sun-pun headlines coming a mile off on this one and took decisive and much needed action.

Bruce Willis - Walter Bruce Willis
Walter? WALTER? His entire effortless cool and action hero swagger has been sabotaged by name terrorists. Get that white (and then immediately brown) tank top back on Bruce and save the day again!

 

Whoopi Goldberg - Caryn Elaine Johnson
If you could choose your name to any name in the world, who else would have landed with ‘Whoopi’? So ridiculous you thought that it couldn’t be made up. It can and it was. She now kind of sounds like an ice cream. Perfect for the current heat-wave.

Tom Cruise - Thomas Mapother IV
Gosh, doesn’t Tom Cruise’s real name sound a bit posh? Maybe he should have kept his birth name, then he would have been slated for that rather than his movies.

John Wayne - Marion Morrison
Everybody’s favourite cowboy, John Wayne, starred on top of many a horse back in the day. Any self respecting steed would have bucked off a man named Marion Morrison so it probably best he went for the change.

Other surprising real names:
Danny DeVito - Daniel Michaeli
Kirk Douglas - Issur Danielovitch Demsky
Ben Kingsley - Krishna Banji
Judy Garland – Frances Gumm
Jamie Foxx - Eric Marlon Bishop
Bob Hope - Leslie Townes Hope
Jodie Foster – Elisabeth Foster
Meg Ryan - Margaret Mary Emily Anne Hyra
Charlie Sheen - Carlos Irwin Estevez
Christopher Walken - Ronald Walken
Gene Wilder - Jerome Silberman



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